we were supposed to rise above

i never do this anymore

Fri, 02 Feb 2007 10:42:20 GMT

i never post in lj.

my best post ever was a conversation transcript.
so here's another.

-so what are you gonna do whiule isaac and i are gone
-fuck broads. lame ones. dirty lame ones.
-why just lame ones?
-i don't wanna have a girlfriend
-so?
-i'll fuck hot lame broads. i'm going for the count. quantity over--
-quantity over quality?
-yeah -- eek
-that's a justin graves choice
-yeah, glad you just thought of that.
-will you miss us?
-yeah, i'll miss you two.
-i'll call ya. tell you how things are going.
-good.
-only while i'm trashed though. so after you have the number that i'll call you from will you call me back? i hope you do it fucking frequently. get caleb perry to call me too. and marc. i want at least three separate people to call me while fucking folded.
-you can count on me, man. man, where's my high life?
-high life? where'd that come from?
-came from my truck, you know my truck carries them on hand.
-you know i wish i had a gun that had a chainsaw on the end of it. i don't think i'd ever fire a single round out of it, i'd just keep chainsawing everyone.
-hehehh, that face. that face, it just keeps on looking at me.

POOOOOOOOOOOL!

Fri, 16 Jun 2006 19:40:25 GMT

i'm getting ready to go to the pool with shayne.

everybody's welcome . . .

the overlook apartments off seminary drive, you'll see the pool, and i'll be there.

holy fuck

Mon, 22 May 2006 21:22:23 GMT

nobody has ever made me this consistently angry. without naming names, i need to vent. i have never met someone as lazy, whiny, stupid . . . i just don't get how a person can be sucessful in the smallest way when he acts like that. i can't be nice to him anymore. and as it appears that he's only getting worse, i can see things getting tense in the near future.

guess what!

Sun, 14 May 2006 18:24:26 GMT

i'm freaking happy.

holy shit

Mon, 24 Apr 2006 08:20:26 GMT

i'm 21.

i might just walk to the gas station and buy some beer.

woo.

tonight

Sun, 16 Apr 2006 07:39:56 GMT

i had a date. it was definitely one of the best first dates i've ever been on.

i think i'm too happy to sleep.

and i think she likes me as much as i like her, so that's good. my luck may well be changing.

thanks for an amazing night. :)

i've got a bigggg crush

Sat, 15 Apr 2006 07:02:33 GMT

sarahhhhhhhh

hey.

Fri, 14 Apr 2006 16:03:14 GMT

i like sarah keith.

isaac's birthday party. please read this shit!

Thu, 13 Apr 2006 19:30:29 GMT

i'm turning 21 soon so on april 24th, everybody needs to come to molly malone's on baxter avenue to celebrate! it's the all ages open mic night i play at every monday. it starts at 9 and i'll be drunk when i get there. i'll play for like a half hour and then i'm gonna get trashed! i think my parents are gonna be there too, so this'll be fun. pleeeease come out and have fucking drunk fun with me!

then i'm going to mag for dollar beer night, and that'll be crazy too, i'm sure.

MAKE SURE YOU'RE THERE!!!
(please)

good things come

Mon, 10 Apr 2006 06:42:37 GMT

so i think i finally got the kick in the ass i've been waiting for. you know, that thing that happens that kind of forces you into that decision you've been wanting to make? long story short, i'm a completely different person now that i'm off drugs. i love going to bed when it's dark, and being awake for more than five minutes before work. i have energy, and optimism, and inspiration now that i haven't known in months. best of all, the shitty things in my life that would always depress me are no more than annoyances. i'm thankful for the people that worried about me, and i'm sorry that i haven't been around.

i'm loving life, and i love my friends, even those that think i forgot about you.

i wanna see people soon, so call me!
502.759.5510

fuck i dunno

Wed, 22 Mar 2006 08:05:56 GMT

yeah, he'll sleep in your bed tonight, i bet. i don't know him, though, so who am i to speculate? but if you let me sleep there, why shouldn't you let him? i just want to talk to you. i still feel like i did. it sucks when i have no justification for jealousy, but it's still an emotion i can't ever avoid with you.

we've been doing fine as friends for a while, but then you kissed me for the first time in three months. why the fuck did you have to kiss me? why did you kiss me again, and why did i kiss you back? it's an action we should have easily been strong enough to refrain from.

UNLESS . . .

unless you still feel like i do. slightly. even slightly. then maybe there's hope. but i'm still jealous tonight - i can't help it.

please love me. please.

please please please

Fri, 17 Mar 2006 01:46:37 GMT

Jamison Taylor French, Russel Lawrence Allen, Jamie Barnes, Isaac Mingo, Gregor Samsa, The Photographic

When: Thursday Mar 16, 2006
at 8:00 PM
Where: Uncle Pleasant's
2126 S. Preston St.
Louisville, KY 40217
US
Description:
Singer/Songwriter Showcase + ONE AMAZING SHOW

9:00 - Jamison Taylor French

9:30 - Russel Lawrence Allen

10:00 - Jamie Barnes

10:30 - Isaac Mingo

AND THEN!
Presented by Red Vinyl Productions

Gregor Samsa and The Photographic

so far today

Wed, 22 Feb 2006 19:26:32 GMT

woke up
watched ellen
ate cinnamon toast crunch
walked downstairs
saw mike
watched part of trainspotting with mike and shayne
ate pizza and ice cream
drank a coke
myspaced
lj-ed

save me from another pointless day.

the next best thing

Tue, 21 Feb 2006 22:16:05 GMT

i live in a self-created disaster of a room, and somehow i manage to make it exponentially messier each day. when am i gonna get tired of it? when am i gonna get tired of everything else that my laziness and self-indulgence creates. i mean, i am tired of it. but this shit is too hard to fix at the moment. i wonder if i'm going to turn out as the man who goes around making "new starts" for himself because everywhere he goes, disaster and heartbreak and chaos seem to follow. he dies lonely, and with insurmountable regret. i keep thinking, "that's not me; i'm talented, i have friends. i'm going places!" but honestly, how am i gonna get anywhere if i keep trapping myself under dirty clothes and fast food bags?

i need to find some money.
i need to kick some habits.
i need to fix some messes.

i need some help.
i need some friends.

herbal remedies

Tue, 21 Feb 2006 00:07:10 GMT

let's just say that it's good to be back.

or should i say "where's that blunt!?"

this is why i never go home

Tue, 07 Feb 2006 09:26:08 GMT

i can take a joke, but sometimes it seems like i'm the constant punchline. i know i don't deserve that, and that's the reason i'm never around.

these thumbs are kinda cool

Tue, 07 Feb 2006 06:43:26 GMT

"i wonder if (dude) will be drunk when he gets back."
"probably."
"it's dollar beer night."
"what kind of beer?"
"domestic longnecks."
"i kinda wish i'd gone although i don't have any money. what do you wanna do?"
"get drunk. get fucked up. i love getting drunk. today, i was thinking about whiskey and my mouth was watering."
"i hate hard liquor."
"really? i love it dude. whiskey is so good. even cheap whiskey, i'm just like mmmm."
"you're like what? what's that noise you just made?"
"mmmm? i dunno what that noise was. today i was at home by myself and we had whipped cream so i was doing whip-its. ha, whip-it's. i'm fourteen. i'm talking about whip-it's playing with nunchucks and light-up thumbs."
"ha"
"i hate going outside to smoke cigarettes. i smoke in my room sometimes and it smells terrible. there has to be something to do."
"huh?"
"there has to be something to do. where did (other dude) go?"
"over to (girl)'s."
"oh. what are they doing, are they like, dating?"
"i never know."
"what an eccentric girl."

if you're gonna do it, do it well.

Sun, 05 Feb 2006 04:53:42 GMT

if not, just give up.

i'm pretty much there.

oh dear

Thu, 02 Feb 2006 05:46:21 GMT

i'm poor.

my phone doesn't work.

this is for shayne griley

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 03:45:21 GMT

since i can't comment on the entry it's for, i'll just put it here, and shayne i hope you see it.

i know how you feel. i know exactly what you're feeling.

"crazy but true is my love for you
but it means nothing now
my friends suggest
'man, just put this to rest and forget her'
but i'm not the man who can just give it time
and feel better"

that's a piece of a song i wrote, but never play. it is probably the closest i've ever come to accurately describing my feelings with words.

if you need anything - ANYTHING - i'm here.
you're still my best friend.

so here's what i think . . .

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 03:36:04 GMT

i'll be moving to chicago in august.

the only thing potentially stopping me is the chance that something might happen to me that's music related, but it's never a sure bet. i'm sure, though, that all i need is a change of scenery, a bigger city, love, a heavy coat, a better job, a car, a blank check made out to me, and furniture from ikea.

i can find at least six of those things easily in chicago.

free show tonight. i'm begging you to come.

Fri, 20 Jan 2006 00:41:04 GMT

this is a big show for me, possibly my biggest ever, and that's why i'm making it free. i need as many people as possible there.

there are two reasons, and one of them has a great deal of weight on my musical future.

here's the details:

9:30
FREE
18+
uncle pleasant's
2126 s. preston st.
louisville, ky 40217

isaac mingo
scott kirkpatrick
brigid kaelin

it would mean the world if you could come out and support us tonight. it's good music, and if it all goes well, it could be the beginning of something great for me.

i'll give more details later.

call me at 7595510 for details.
<3

woohoo

Wed, 18 Jan 2006 05:36:18 GMT

uk won cause me and courtney watched it together.

wow

Tue, 17 Jan 2006 10:40:02 GMT

early morning. such is life. my day starts in the evening.

in any case, time alone at cafe 360 is more fun than it would seem. and, as my laptop is useless until i can find a windows 2000 boot disk, it's an opportunity to internet it up for a while. i value free time, as long as i'm not bored to death.

some much needed changes. getting my hair cut later today. aaaaand i get to see my twin. that is probably the most exciting thing that has happened in a while. that's saying a lot. my life's been unusually eventful lately, and even with all the chaos and changes and drama and abnormality to keep me on my toes, seeing courtney in about twelve hours is pretty much the best thing ever.

she's nothing short of fucking awesome.

i'll put up some pictures of the new hair later.
love you.

worst night ever . . .

Sun, 15 Jan 2006 08:28:26 GMT

so i had my first two serving shifts at jillian's today. one from 11am to 4pm, the other from 6pm to 2am. the first shift went well - i made more money than i thought i would on less tables than i thought i'd have. saturday dinners, however, are never as easy as the lunches. i found out the hard way. it started slow, but as time went on, the momentum started building, and i started moving faster than i should have. i'm pretty scatterbrained anyway, but somehow along the way, i managed to lose the booklet containing the hundred-fifty dollars cash and about two-hundred dollars in credit card receipts i had collected throughout my shift.

if you've ever lost something valuable that doesn't belong to you, you know that sick feeling you get the moment you realize it's gone. it's even worse that i had set it down somewhere without thinking, and it was at least ten minutes before i looked down and noticed it wasn't there. still worse was the next thought that hit me: that money was gone, and it wasn't coming back.

in the end, i guess it's not so bad. i'm pretty sure i'll keep the cash in my pocket from now on, and on the bright side, it's probably a good thing this happened on my first night as a server. i don't see how i can go anywhere but uphill.